Saturday, June 14, 2014

Me and Cancer

This post may be a little depressing, so be careful if you will continue.

Who knows me, from a close distance, knows that I get easily attached to movies that have cancer in it. I tried to deny it for a while, but I guess it is true. I have unresolved issues with tumors (and cancer specifically).

Me and cancer have unpleasant memories together. I witnessed few stories that had cancer in it. And as I have a really good memory, I remember that whole journey, all from its start and being healthy to its end and the walk to the graveyard.
I was about 8 or 9 years old when my grandmother got it, yet I remember everyday of her long journey. I haven't met my uncle in my life, yet I remember my dad's talks about his illness.

Based on my family history, I know I have a crape gene that is waiting to go nuts and produce a couple of tumors for me. Yeah, I know it is not all about genetics, but having that gene increases its chances to happen.
Every time I hear about a new cancer patient, I instantly unintentionally see myself in his spot and going through the journey till its end.

I never never never cared about my weight in my whole life, but one of the reasons I panicked about my late weight loss issue is that cancer was the first reason that popped in my head.

I HATE cancer, I HATE tumors, I really do. My only hope is that if I ever got it, I wish I will have the people I love around me, just to help me when it kicks hard.

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